Who am I? This question is almost impossible to answer at such a young as because I’m still growing up,still changing,learning from my mistakes and still overcoming things that will help me grow as a person to find who I am. Minute by Minute, Day by Day, I experience new thing that helps me take yet another step into an big world that will help me grow as a person and learn new things that will help me figure out who I am as a person and turn me into a even better person than I am today. All I know now is the person I am today.
I am an 18 year old girl still trying to figure out who I am,I have learned so many things from my word,thought along with things others have said to me,I know who I want to become, I’ve learned to define happiness in my own terms. Hello it’s me Francine and I’ve been waiting all these years to graduate from high school and finally that day is approaching. I am a girl , who makes mistakes,who laughs,loves,cries and smiles the list goes on. Everything that I’ve gone through makes me who I am and helps me become the person I want to become.
I believe that my Neurofibromatosis has helped me grow into the person I am today but I don’t let my NF define me or affect me every day. It has made me stronger and more compassionate person. It makes understanding what people go through and how it goes beyond what you see. To be nice to everyone you meet because you don’t know what they have going on beyond what they show. It made me stronger both physically and emotionally because of all the a pain I have endured. It is so hard getting up in the morning with my back pain but I push through the pain to get to school.
I am still trying to figure out who I am that’s part of life all I know is who I am as of now. I see myself as shy and quiet girl as first, but then I can be very loud and outgoing and quite sassy. I am funny, at least I think, I do not always say the right things and I feel like I can judge people at times but I’m for the most part nice to everyone I meet. If someone says something rude to me then I tend to make a comment back at them. I never want to lose my sense of humor when I grow older or the sass I have because it makes me who I am.
I can be very sweet and sassy and caring, all at the same time which I think is a good thing and I never want to change that. As of now, I am a girl who’s still trying to figure out who she is and trying to become an even better person. Who do I want to become? I want to become someone who can be content with what they have and not always care what people think of me. When I think of this question of who I want to become I immediately think of Sabrina Kelley she was one of the most amazing people I have ever met, she was always nice to everyone she met even if they were mean to her and how could light up a room when she walked in.
I want to be that sparkle in someone’s life like she was, she always knew how to make someone some and laugh. To look at everything so positively in life and not always see the negatives, to see all the beautiful things life has to offer. It’s not alway fair and happy, but it’s such a beautiful thing . So I hope that I can see everything it has to offer me and all the new experience it will bring it in the life to come in college and when I am an adult and have kids. I want to be happy with my life and not worry about all the bad that life has in it because there are so many amazing and beautiful things it has to offer.
High School was some of the hardest times of my life and at the same time some of the best. It has taught me so many important things that have been a part of figuring out who I am. Over the past four years, what people thought of me has really affected me . People spread rumors about you, talk behind your back,call you names it is going to happen at some point. I have learned that not everyone in your life is going to like you but you have to move past that and not care what people think of you.
I want to change all the drama that happened in high school, I want to forget all the bad things that have happened and forget the drama people caused in my life. I would also like to change the comment that I occasionally make to people if they make rude comments towards me. To be happy with the friends that I have, I want to not care about the things people say and think about me cause what I think is the only thing that matters. What is happiness? Well everyone has their own definitions of what it means to them. The dictionary definition is a feeling or showing pleasure and contentment.
Happy is what you make it for yourself, the definition is almost never the same throughout your life because as you grow as a person, it can change and I have seen that in my own life. When I was younger , I defined happy as having all the toys I wanted and candy, I was happy if my parents gave me money for the school supply store, they had every Friday at vinal so I could buy myself those little cell phone erasers. When I was younger being happy was about all the materialistic thing, but I have learned that does not really matter.
Today, I define happiness as having fun in your in your life and being able to laugh and smile,being content with what you have,seeing the joy that comes from all the beautiful things in the world. That is how I define happy today who knows how I will define happy in the future, it could be the same or could change. Language and the behavior of others has a huge impact on my life, whether it is positive or negative. The word and behaviors of certain people in the school have negatively affected me in many ways.
People in my grade have always said really mean things to my face, behind my back and started rumors and I always let them have a huge impact on my life. This one girl always goes around saying stuff about me it started sophomore year when she called me a piece of S*** in front of my whole class, this was when I was friends with her which is why I think I let it affect me so much. Then this year, I started being friend with her again and then she flipped on me in math class for no reason, calling me the C-word among other names in front of the class .
I literally started crying, what hurt me the most not one kid in the class said anything to her and asked if I was okay. One of the boys in the class kept looking back at me to see if I was okay, which actually made me feel a little bit better because I could tell he cared about me. The next day in Marine biology this boy asked the girl who flipped on me why she flipped at me for no reason and called me all those names because it was not right and then she flipped at him and my other friend made a comment to her and she finally stopped.
I feel like these things have shaped me into the person I am and I do not treat people the way they treat me because I know how it feels. Also, a teacher made me feel really stupid in class everyday I walked in she would always make smart comments about the quality of my work, even though it was the same as the person next to me she would give me half credit, On one of my essays she told me that it sounded uneducated.
This made me feel so stupid and bad about all the work in that class so I never really tried because I felt that the quality of my work would never be good enough. There are many people’s actions and language that has affected me in a positive way. The friends that I have who are always there with their comforting words and who stand up for me like those two friends of mine did to that girl. Michaela C is one of my very good friends and when she knows I’m upset she is always the first person to text me to see if I’m okay and helps me get through the rough day I’m having.
Danielle is one person that can always make me laugh like that day that the girl called me the C word in front of my math class, I was talking to Danielle about it and she made ma go from crying to laughing within 2 minutes she was one of the girls who said something to the girl for being mean to me. The friends I have are some of the most amazing people they are always there for me when I need them and vice versa. My teammates always cheering for me along the sideline always help me to run that extra inch and play even better because I knew I had their support.
My family’s behavior and language have also have had a huge impact on my life, knowing that they would always be there and helped me get to where I am today. Overall, I think that the language and behaviors of the people in my life have had a huge impact on my life. Overall, I am stilling trying to figure out who I am and that is a good thing because I am still growing and still trying to figure things out. Yes there are going to be amzing times in my life but I know that there is also going to bad times, I am just not going to let the mad things faze me because they are just like way.
One quote that I like to think of when thinking of who I am “ You are not who you think you are. You are not your fears,your thoughts or your body. You are not your insecurities,your career,or your memories. You’re not what you’re criticized for and you’re not what you are praised for. You are boundless wealth of potential. You are everything thats ever been. Don’t sell yourself short. Every Sunset ever mountain,every river,every passionate crowd,every concert,every drop of rain- that’s you. So go find yourself.
Go find your strength,find your beauty,find your purpose. Stop crafting your mask. Stop hiding. Stop lying to yourseld and letting people lie to yoy. You’re not lacking anything except awareness. Everything you’ve ever wanted is already there,awaiting your attention,awaiting your time”(Vironika Tugaleva). I think this quote is a pefrect summart of trying to fgure out who I am and what I want. Who I am and what I want has always been right in front of me, I’m just lacking the awarness to see it.