Harassment and bullying have been linked to 75% of schoolshooting incidents. Bullying can largely impact one’s life, even causing them to turn towards violence. The violence of bullying may separate a person from others but after it is still possible to meet others. Dealing with bullying is no easy feat, but after getting help and dealing with it, one can still make friends and enjoy life. One of the challenges facing school students the most is bullying. This may be because “bullies are usually motivated by a sense of power and control they feel when picking on people” (“Cliques”).
People enjoy feeling like they have control over someone or something. This is especially true in bullies and a reason one may continually pick on another person. Another thing that makes this problem worse is “when the bullies are the school’s elite students, teachers and administrators often turn a blind eye to such issues” (“Cliques”). This makes it harder for students to make the bullying stop. Teachers will listen but will not stop the bullying since they may feel as long as that student does good in the class, they are not a problem.
With teachers turning blind eyes and people controlling others, family members and friends doing the same will make bullying worse. Friends and family can sometimes hurt a close one, both physically and emotionally. It is found that “people most likely to see bullying are the close friends of the victim or bully” (“Bullying and Cyberbullying”). Bullying can come from anyone and this includes a student’s friend. Most times kids will not know what to do because they may think the bully is just being a rough friend.
This is because “their school or peer culture has enforced the faulty belief that silence is the best way to protect a friend” (“Bullying and Cyberbullying”). Students might not tell an adult because one might believe it is just banter between the two. So, the student stays quiet and does not get the friend into trouble with anyone that could most likely solve the problem. Friends often bully other friends they have and this might happen because one changes how they act or dress which, makes the other individual dislike them. Students love to tease other kids about how one may look or how one may act.
Bullies always tend to pick on these kids who are “different or don’t fit in with the mainstream… how you dress, act, or because of your race, religion, or sexual orientation” (Robinson and Segal). Many students will find things that they do not like amusing and are willing to make fun of others. This is one method a bully uses to attack the victims, often calling them names and teasing them about things they do. Bullies may also pick on kids “because they’re jealous of” (Robinson and Segal) that person. The bully may want something that a student has and because of the jealousy they have, one will pick on a student.
They will continually pick on someone they are jealous of and may even acquire the same items and brag about them being better. The personality and characteristics of a person help bullies choose a target, as do other students or influences around them. Peer pressure is a struggle every person goes through, especially while going to school. People may become bullies since “peer pressure is an important influence on young people’s attitudes and behaviours” (Kaplan 55). Negative peer pressure may give a person the wrong idea and starts to create a rebellious student which could turn into a bully.
While positive peer pressure will help students be “faithful to their own values” (Kaplan 29). Peer pressure from families may also create a bully and why one may “try to become part of a group because of their family situation” (Kaplan 28). Since one’s parents could hurt them emotionally or physically that person may want to do the same to other people. So, these people will seek others that want to do the same, influencing the kids to be like the parents. Peer pressure plays a large factor in bullying, but there is a way a student can avoid or stop both the peer pressure and bullying.
Bullying is a completely avoidable thing, and some of the time a bully may stop and leave that student alone. One of the simplest ways a student can avoid bullying is to “sit down at a new lunch table” (Murphy). If one were to sit at a new lunch table that person could get to know the other students, and when the bully comes those students can stand up and help. The bully may also not be able to find the victim, this could decrease the encounters with one or completely stop the bullying. A drastic change one could make is to “join a new club or team” (Murphy).
An after school club or activity will help keep away from the bully after school and when traveling home or waiting for a ride. Asking a teacher to move a students seat away from a bully in class can help stop conflicts and can even make the bully stop attacking. Students are not the only ones that can help make bullying stop, teachers and parents can also help. Parents and teachers can play a huge in factor in whether a student gets bullied or not. Often times when teachers and parents “listen and focus on the child” (“Support The Kids Involved”) they can find the cause and problem of the bullying.
This will show that people care for the child and want to help and may boost ones self confidence. Speaking with the kid may also help relieve the stress of the kid and let them know something will happen. Another strategy adults could do is to “work together to resolve the situation” (“Support The Kids Involved”). The adults could give advice on what the students should do when encountering the bully. They also could give tips on what to do that will keep them away from the bully. After a kid has found ways to avoid bullies, the kid can make new friends and find joy in his or her life.
Friends can help a student while in the school career or later in life. After bullying finding a friend is a good way to “improve your mood” (Robinson, Lawrence et al. ) and “reduce stress and depression” (Robinson, Lawrence et al. ). Students will often lack in school and change from the normal mood one would have during bullying. Having a friend that one could count on will help improve how a student will act, especially after bullying. A good friend is one who “will show a genuine interest in what’s going on in your life… nd how you think and feel about things” (Robinson, Lawrence, et al. ).
Good friends will care about what is happening in another persons life and may even help with problems. Although it may be time to look at a friendship if a friend brings in bad people and influences. While it is good to have a friend that will listen, it is also as important that others will listen to that friend. Friendship is built on trust and each friend should care and help the other while also listening. A good friend will make the “other person feel important-and do it sincerely” (Varnum 27).
If one continually compliments an others abilities it will help make that person feel more important. Doing this will help build a trust between friends and strengthen the friendship between the two. It is also important to “let the other person do a great deal of the talking” (Varnum 28) so they know they have a friend there. A person listening will always help, it can relieve the stress and troubles that a friend may be having. Letting a person come and complain to one will help build trust between friends as well.
Being a good friend is important in building a strong friendship, particularly after one has gone through bullying and is trying to find new friends. Harassment and bullying from others is something help is need to be dealt with, but after it is possible to make new friends or acquaintances. Bullies love to have control over people, but loosening the control can turn the situation and change a persons life. Bullying can effect and alter a person’s life, whether or not the person does something to change it will decide the one’s outcome.