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Exactly Why My Life Sucks

My name is Rosalind Marie Claire. I have two brothers, one older and one younger, and two sisters, also one older and one younger. Which makes me stuck smack-dab in the middle, and let me tell you what if you were a middle child growing up in a house with only two bathrooms one of which us kids can’t go into because that’s our parents master bathroom, it sucks.

My oldest sister, Jamie, is the star athlete of the Claire family. If there is a try out date for one sport or another she is there. I don’t know how she does it. How does she manage to play all those sports and keep at least a B+- A average? I just don’t get it. This is her senior year hear at the Ocean-Valley High School. She is going to the university of Connecticut on a full basketball scholarship.(she is so lucky!) I really will miss her, NOT, I am glade she is leaving because I get her room!

My oldest brother, John Jr., is a junior this year, he plays all the macho sports like football and lacrosse and wrestling, you know all those sports that include the coaches barking like dogs and making the team growl like a pack of hungry wolves ready to kill. I personally think it makes them look really stupid. But I guess I should be happy for him he already has scouts looking out for him. All the girls at school go ga-ga like little babies over his big strong muscles, I think its gross the way he’s always flexing and watching himself in the mirror.

Then there’s my little sister Jackie who is two years younger than I am. She still goes to the Ocean-Valley Middle School. She’s in seventh grade and the smartest kid in the whole house. She has about a million and one books in our room,(we share and that is why I can’t wait for Jamie to move out!) She is the one that always knows the word your looking for and the definition of it off the top of her head. She is also the one who gets the rest of us grounded when report cards come home, she’s the one with straight A+’s and who always has comments like, “a pleasure to have in class” and “Is an exceptional student keep up the good work” and just stuff like that, that just makes you want to gag.

My younger brother, Jake! He is four and is a little menace. Have you ever scene the show, Denice The Menace? Well that is my brother Jake! He runs around the house with a fake cowboy gun screaming, “Bang Bang Bang!” He love when you play cops and robbers with him but he gets mad when you run away from him when he tries to arrest you. Like any four year old little kid I guess. He really looks up to John Jr. He follows him around and when he goes to pose for himself in the mirror Jake goes to the other mirror and tries to pose too, I guess you could call it cute but when he starts wearing spandex shorts to show “his muscle” then I will have to say something!

Then Mom and Dad, formally known as Julia and John Sr. Claire. They are pretty good parents I suppose. Dad was a big athlete when he was growing up so he favors Jamie and John Jr. And then there’s mom she tries really hard, but when you have a smart-alec daughter who corrects you and a monkey boy who belongs being brought up by wild gorillas instead of civilized people like my parents, she does pretty well.

Then there’s me, Rosalind or Rose or Ross or Rosy, whatever. If you haven’t noticed that all my brothers and sisters names even my parents start with a “J”? Well if you didn’t I did it makes me feel like I don’t belong. Mom tells me she wanted to name me something special so that I would be different because when she first held me in her arms she said that, she saw in my little eyes that I would one day have to change the world so she wanted me to standout away from the rest of the Claire family unit.

I have blue eyes when the rest of my family has brown. I have a beautiful head of golden blonde hair with just a small tint of both brown and red when the rest of the family has bright blonde hair that really sticks out, everybody knows their Claire’s, but who am I? “She must be just one of the girls friends, how could I be apart of the Claire family?” Those are only some of the things I hear when we go somewhere together as a family, I even hear it at school from my teachers they think I’m just a distant cousin from like outer space or something.

When the rest of my family has one talent or another, like the sports or being so smart, (I don’t know what Jake’s talent will be quite yet but I’m sure it will be something better then mine!) and all I am is average just a Plain Jane. My grades usually hover around b- or c- that’s not very good in my house, so I’m usually the one who gets grounded the longest. And I defiantly don’t play sports! Besides Jake I am the shortest person in the family, Dad’s-6′ 1″, Mom’s-5′ 11″, Jamie’s-6′ 2″ Just taller than dad, then John Jr.-6′, even Jackie is 5′ 5″. And I’m a measly 5′ and boy does it stink!

At home you would think it was any ordinary family because we all run from home to school to home and back to school for one practice or another. I usually just stay home and watch TV or talk on the phone with my friends.

All of us have 3-way calling so: I call Cat and Max. Then Cat calls Ashley, and Max calls Rachel. Then Ashley calls Robin, and Rachel calls Melissa. Then Robin calls Jeff and Melissa calls Josh. Then Jeff calls Dan and Josh calls Alex, and that’s the end of our little phone fun I guess you could say.

We are our own little club at school. We call ourselves the F.F.E.C., the Friends For Ever Club. I know it’s a little geeky but we think its funny!

My two best friends are Cat(Cat is short for Catelyn) and Max that’s why I call them first. Cat and I have been friends since pre-school and Max and I have been dating for the past two years. The other eight friends don’t really mean that much to me they’re actually just friends of Cat and Max’s friends that I’m just nice to and get along with but they really aren’t my friends.

Now I’ve shown you my parents and friends and brothers and sisters but the next people I’m going to mention are the real people who claim to be helping me through life. But if I can tell you a little secret all teachers are out to ruin your life!

My home room teacher is so evil. I have English as home room, with Mrs. Been, and you know how English can put you to sleep at any time of the day BUT FIRST PERIOD! How can they put a kid in such a terrible class so early in the morning? Then for second period I have Biology with Ms. Flowerpot. Then third I have Social Studies with Mr. Trump. Then lunch. Then after lunch I have study hall in the library. Only two more classes Ms. Frenchie with French and Art class with Mrs. Draw.

I am telling you teachers are out to ruin our pointless adolescent lives. Our parents are totally wrong teachers are too so evil. I mean I do my homework and study really hard to pass the classes and they still fail me. But I guess it would help if I did the projects and actually passed the tests. Plus when I don’t understand something I should probably ask the teacher for help, but you know what when I ask for help they always tell me that I should pay closer attention in class instead of daydreaming or writing notes to your friends.

How is a girl supposed to have a comeback for that one. I do pay attention in class most of the time but when the teacher just sits there and talks about stuff that’s I find really boring how do you pay attention? What about when the teacher starts yelling at you or the whole class in some other language? What is a girl to do? I don’t know maybe you can help me figure that out!

You know what I don’t write notes to all my friends during class I only write them to Max and Cat! I don’t write to any other people in the F.F.E.C. they never write me any so why should I write them notes?

Only in a great while do they write me a note and that’s only because they want me to hook them up with someone or they want to break up with someone. I am what you would call a matchmaker. I think that’s the only reason why they still hang out with me.

Cat and Max are convinced that isn’t true because when they aren’t around and I’m with the rest of the clan, the clan are sometimes really evil. Although the girls are worse then the boys but they can all be brutal. I thought that we were all in this “club” together but I guess not because even in the classes that we have together they never save me a seat so I have to sit way up in the very front of the room.

I once herd a rumor that was spread about me and it was really bad because someone told the guys at school that I would sleep with them if they paid me $50. You wont ever guess who started the rumor. It was Ashley!! I never really liked her she was Cat’s friend first then Max dated her now she’s just one of the clan.

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