This year, almost like every year, I decided to spend my summer vacation with my family far away from any tourist attractions at a place in the middle of nowhere. Wednesday morning we were hurring in the usual manner, half an hour too late, to the airport, because my wife and my 16-year-old daughter spent half a day in the bathroom. What, in the world, are they doing there? Why does it take them so long? Why, above all, is that it takes them so long today even though they know we are late? I will never understand this. But enough of womens weird bathroom behavior now, this is not our theme today. No, our them today is travelling.
So now picture me driving like a maniac during rush hour to get to the airport half across the city with two teenagers on the backseat killing each other on time. I try to be patient and not to burst into tears or killing someone. I have been through this for several years now. But especially today where half of the nation is on the street, millions of white haired Sunday drivers are plugging the streets. Not getting made at those drivers is not one of my advanced social skills Only 60 seconds left until the departure of our plane we reached the airport and as usual they changed the departure gate.
If that would be something new for me, they always change the departure gate, especially when you are late. So I went to the information, knowing before hand what the answer will be and not expecting anything different. Gate two. I dont know why, but that is what they always tell you. Where the Gate for the flight number 243648? you ask. Gate two. Where is the Concorde gate? Gate two. Where can I find the Gate for the flight to Australia? Gate two. Where is Gate seven? Gate two.
Well, after standing in a painful slowly moving line, I got my information: Gate two. Ten minutes later, we found our departure gate, it was gate no. ven. Finally after all we made our plane. There is the thing with the flight attendance. They come in two types, all disagreeable. First, there the flight attendance who are never there and you actually do not even know that they exist. You keep asking them for stuff and they tell you: Just one moment, please! , but you never get it. Secondly, there are the ones who are the most nicest, friendliest and sweetiest person in the world and all they want is to comfort you, but do not want any comfort or help. My least favorite ones is the one you can not get rid of. They always come up to you and say:
Sir, can I help you somehow? You tell her: No, thank you. Im fine Ok,she replies and a couple minutes later she comes back. Do you want coffee or tee? No, thank you. Im fine Orange or apple juice? Maybe, some nuts? No, thank you! I dont want anything. We also have chocolate covered brezels? No, thank you! I dont want anything. Would you like to try them? I really dont want to try them. Im sure you will like them. They are very delicious! Please understand, Im allergic to nuts and brezels. So I dont really want them!!! She gives you a charming smile and thirty seconds later she is back telling you: We also have fruit snacks.
Listen, I dont want anything to eat. I just want to realax and enjoy the flight. I had a really tough da. So, please leave me alone! How do you fell about duty free shopping, she replies. Do you see what I mean? They drive you insane before you already know it. Being on vacation is such a tough time, but it all comes to a point where I decide to send my family through all this alone next year and I saty home. After a three hour delayed flight we reached our final destination. The moment I saw the hotel, I left my family there, turned around, took the next flight home and locked the door.